


Lilium

by tsuupra



Category: ChroNoiR, Nijisanji, Virtual Streamer Animated Characters
Genre: (but perhaps it's the other way around), Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Reincarnation, Sickfic, can be read as romantic or platonic, i just really like trust in relationships, kuzuha gets sick and kanae gets worried
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 06:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29485581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsuupra/pseuds/tsuupra
Summary: As Kanae looks, he realizes that he hasn't paid much attention to Kuzuha's physical appearance. Previously enraptured by the pleasant atmosphere to have noticed, he suddenly finds himself filled with dread as he watches him because, in a few seconds, Kanae sees his feverish look, hyper focused at the way he shakingly gets up - it quickly comes to his mind that he should've taken it more seriously hours ago.Kuzuha gets a fever.
Relationships: Kanae & Kuzuha (Nijisanji), Kanae/Kuzuha (Nijisanji)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 94





	Lilium

**Author's Note:**

> The tiger lily represents wealth and confidence, as the flower was often associated with nobility - in the past, giving them as a gift to someone was regarded as very special because of their value. It signifies protection against harm. Growing this plant in and around their homes is a way to ward off bad spells, ghosts, and all kinds of evil.  
> _  
> The symbolic meaning of traditional lilies in white color is purity, innocence and simplicity. Because of the Greek myth of Hera and Zeus, lilies are associated with rebirth and motherhood. In China, lilies are used in weddings because they are tied to 100 years of love. As the spiritual meaning of lilies, these flowers are commonly used for religious purposes.  
>  _  
> See also:  
> _  
>  They are the ideal gift to say “I’m sorry” and also to express sympathy.  
> _
> 
> There are no mentions of vomit, but there are small mentions of death, blood, apathy, and suffocation, which is primarily in the nightmare. They are written in italics.

Kuzuha sneezed. His body violently jerked forward as he did so, where he defeatingly seeked another poor tissue from Kanae's box.

"Are you coming down with something?" Kanae finally decided to comment, after witnessing his 6th sneeze in the last hour, his words tinged with concern. "Your nose seems pretty clogged. We can call off today if you don't feel okay."

They were supposed to have an offline collab stream over the weekend, and the two took the opportunity to hang out together a few days before it. Kuzuha decided to sleep over at his house, since it was closer to the train, which meant they could visit the city if they wanted to. Kanae had wanted to go, but ever since he saw Kuzuha's state from the train, he had changed his mind and decided he'd rather stay home, much to Kuzuha’s confusion.

Kuzuha leaned back into his couch absent-mindedly, glancing at Kanae as he thought of his answer.

".. I'm fine," he answered, waving his hand lazily. The room was full of button mashing and joysticks. His voice was nasally as he sniffed, and he subconsciously hunched his shoulders in, which didn't help Kanae’s case. "Vampires… don't get sick. It's cold and my skin is just pale as hell." 

"Then what's this, hm?" he teased. "Do vampires not have allergies either?"

Kanae doesn't know the full details of what vampires are immune to, or if pure silver actually harms them. Can vampires actually get sick? Would he have to resort to non-human treatments? He's never had the need to know, so it hasn't really been brought up. He’s seen Kuzuha wear crosses, ironically enough, so he knows that belief was just superstition. The little he knows is from what little Kuzuha has shared about himself.

Well… that sounds wrong. It wasn't that Kuzuha wasn't willing to show his feelings. He knows his dislike of green peas, how he's quick to show reassurance to others with the right words, and that he can't stand it when Kanae calls him Ku-chan in a cutesy voice, and things no one else knows of him.

"I'm fineee," Kuzuha stressed, ignoring the bait. "I probably stayed up one too many days and now I’m paying for it. I’ll sleep extra tonight.”

He stares at the dark eye bags under his eyes, a common occurrence during the winters he’s spent with him, and the unfocused look Kuzuha has. He can link it to the lack of sleep, since he doesn't have a perfect track record himself but…

“Are you sure?”

"Mm."

Still unconfident, he finds himself pausing the game and walking over to check his forehead for his temperature. Kuzuha blinks awake at the sudden touch of his palm. "You do feel kind of warm. Hey, what's that smug look for?" 

Kuzuha gives him one of his big grins when he lifts his hand - the ones where he closes his eyes, laughs, and starts talking with his mouth open like an idiot. 

“You’re worried about me~” He says, but it comes more like, “Yerhh hourhweed abhouh mah”. 

Kanae’s never seen Kuzuha seek blood - the only thing that comes to mind is the strawberry drink he asks for. He once debated if Kuzuha really was a vampire because of it, but decided the notion was silly due to his unnatural appearance. He knows practically nothing about vampires, and it’s not like he knows many to learn from. Can red substitute for blood, or is Kuzuha just into that one drink? He's mocked the notion of vampires with tomato juice before, when he saw an old movie poster advertising during October. It was hilarious to Kanae that Kuzuha got so annoyed for a trivial thing.

"Someone needs to," he replies lightly, unable to hide his laugh. "I can't let you throw up in my house. This floor is carpet."

"You're worried~ about me~" he repeats, and starts making celebration noises. "I can't believe I'm seeing the day. Are _you_ feeling okay? You're being mighty kind."

"You're in perfect health if you can make so much noise." He flicks his forehead while he still can, much to the chagrin of his victim. He steps away, pausing underneath the door frame of his kitchen. "I should start cooking - call if you need me."

Kuzuha stands out to him; he’s honest in all of his answers in a way that yells it's Kuzuha and he gets adorably shy when he manages to surprise him. He’s loud and crass, and ends up making Kanae do all the work for chores, but there’s something steady about his presence, something comfortable and uplifting and familiar. That’s why he wonders why sometimes, Kuzuha will turn uncharacteristically silent when he’s talking, and Kanae gets an overwhelming sense of helplessness. He doesn’t want him to think about whatever’s making him have such a face, like he screwed up and everything collapses with him. Kanae knows he's not ready to talk about it, and that's okay, but he's a little afraid of when he does. He's afraid to ask, to know what pressure could possibly make Kuzuha, out of all people, hesitate.

Kanae wonders if he knows Kuzuha as much as he knows Kanae.

Kuzuha does a small wave in return, ignorant to his thoughts.

* * *

Kuzuha eats dinner with no problem, if not less eager than usual. After that, he kept pushing to continue, insisting his health was fine.

("Are you still that worried?" He said. "I went around and ate medicine while you were still cooking."

"I'm not," he replied, but he didn't feel all that enthusiastic to hide his lie.)

So, the collaboration stayed on schedule. 

Despite his behavior earlier, Kuzuha showed no signs of tiredness, save for a few coughs. His performance throughout the night stayed consistently strong and the room echoed with delighted laughter, game after game. 

_Maybe it really was just a lack of sleep,_ he thought.

Eventually though, hours later after they started, a comfortable silence hovered over them. He drank in the silence, soothed by the odd comfort of having another person just being with him.

Kanae loved offline collabs - he enjoyed voice calls fine enough of course, but it was different in a way, sometimes unfulfilling. The way a person moves as they laugh, or the small habits they have as they talk; the body tells a lot about a person. You couldn't see those easily online. A voice chat couldn't be compared to a visit.

Noticing his distracted state, Kuzuha paused the game and put down his controller. "What are you thinking about?" Kuzuha asked, surprising Kanae. His voice slurred a little from sleepiness.

Kanae hummed. "How much fun this weekend has been," he said.

"Haah? We didn't even go anywhere - all we did was hang out. You said you wanted to visit the city."

"Ah," he blinked. "We can go next time if you were looking forward to it." 

"No, no, that's not it! It's that you wanted to go." Kuzuha sighed as he held his head, his forehead furrowing as he thought of how to phrase his next words. "I didn't really think of it at the time... but you changed your mind when you saw me, right? When we met, you said that you didn't really feel like going anymore. …Did I really look that bad?"

"You still look bad _today_ ," Kanae huffed. "You got stares and everything at the train station - you weren't wearing a mask, it looked super inconsiderate." 

"It's not contagious..." he whined. "I figured I didn't need one?"

"So you admit you _are_ sick," Kanae mused. Kuzuha groaned, his eyes shutting in discomfort. He could sense the chat heightened in activity. 

"I'm not!" he finally managed, although weakly. 

He stood up from his position, presumably to slap Kanae playfully in the shoulder. As Kanae looks, he realizes that he hasn't paid much attention to Kuzuha's physical appearance. Previously enraptured by the pleasant atmosphere to have noticed, he suddenly finds himself filled with dread, because in a few seconds he watches him, Kanae sees his feverish look, hyper focused at the way he struggles to breathe as he gets up - it quickly comes to his mind that he should've taken it more seriously hours ago.

"Wait, Kuzu-"

Kanae watches as Kuzuha's eyes roll back and falls, colliding messily against his table. 

* * *

_"What are you thinking about?"_

_He pauses in his step, taken back by the break in silence. He's not really sure what to say that would serve as a pleasant topic, and he stares intently on the white floors as he walks. "Ah… um… nothing important really. I'm just following you around." He winces slightly once it comes out. "Not that I don't want to be here."_

_The person in front of him laughs, and he can't fathom why. He feels bad for making the atmosphere awkward even when he's with his friend._

_"That's ok." His companion smiles, and he feels brave enough to look up, to see the sunlight reflect off of his hair, hands outstretched towards him patiently as an offer. "I'm glad you came to visit me anyway, when you have time." It goes unsaid that he often did - he's the only visitor. "Some new people volunteered to plant some flowers in the garden in the back - mind helping me get there? They haven't bloomed yet, but I think they'll look beautiful once they do."_

* * *

The thermometer beeps at 39 Celsius. 

Kuzuha hates the hospital, he thinks helplessly, for a ton of valid reasons like the overwhelming smell of sick people, and he's not sure if they would even be useful for him. If Kuzuha took medicine from his cabinet, then it was safe to assume he could use it. 

Kanae glances at the lying figure in bed, forcefully in sleep. Sitting against the bed idly in a chair, he knows all he can do now is wait. 

Any desire to stream in order to pass the time has gone away. Idly, he types a few characters on his phone, hesitating and rewording his tweet in a way he knows is pathetic. He feels like he should apologize to the viewers, but he thinks if he starts, he won't be able to stop saying sorry.

He should make some soup, so that Kuzuha could stomach it when he wakes up. He should get a glass of water, for the medicine. He unfurls his balled fists and breathes deeply. There’s a list of activities he could be doing in his head, but he’s not sure what to do.

In the end, he manages to tweet out something that makes sense before he says something irrational. More time passes than he realizes; Kuzuha groans quietly in front of him, turning over to where Kanae can see his red eyes crack open slightly in the dim room. 

"...hurts," He mutters, his hand reaching over to his temple.

"You hit your head on the table when you fainted," Kanae tells him, lowering his voice in order to not make that headache worse. "I couldn't catch you in time. Can you sit up? I have some medicine."

"...nnm." 

Kanae coaxes him into a sitting position when it’s apparent he needs help. It’s worrying how hot he is now, and yet he can feel Kuzuha shivering as he moves out of the blanket. There’s wet clumps of hair in his face, and he moves to wipe away the sweat beaded on his forehead. Instantly, Kuzuha leans into his touch, eyes fluttering as he sighs in relief at the cold surface. Kanae’s chest twists at the sight.

 _He's really out of it_ , he notes concerningly. His head is much hotter than earlier today. "I'm going to get the water, okay?"

He feels him nod and relax back. When Kanae enters again, his head is now propped against the bed and he looks at him, eyes no longer as glassy as before.

"Here." He gives Kuzuha the pills and his hands clumsily reach out for the glass of water. "Drink slowly, it's a little hot."

Kanae winces as he downs the cup in one go anyway. Instantly, his eyes shoot open, but he swallows it all without protest. "...thanks," he coughs, handing him back the cup. Despite it, he’s just as hyper aware as he was when he was healthy; the way he stares at Kanae and becomes remorseful tells him he already has a feeling on what Kanae’s thinking. "I’m sorry.”

The memory of Kuzuha collapsing is still fresh in his mind. He needs to say something. "You really scared me there, Kuzuha. Why didn't you say something?"

"Kanae…"

He’s not sure where to start, or what to say. Something in the back of his mind bites with vicious venom; normally he knows he would ignore it, but right now he feels too agitated to care. _Did he not trust him enough?_ "We promised that we wouldn't hide things from each other when it got too much," he stressed, hoping his curiosity didn’t bleed through. "Was this really because you didn't sleep? What if it got worse because of today?" 

"Stop that, you didn’t cause it," Kuzuha cuts him off. Kanae slumps. His voice is quieter than usual, but it's still resolute. "I'm sorry I hid it from you. I thought... I could handle it for one more day."

Why was he hiding this? _I've never seen him like this,_ he thinks bitterly. _How many times did he suffer through this alone?_ _Was it even in my place to ask?_ _Why didn’t he say something?_

He’s scared if he presses him, he’ll never speak of it again. It’s too easy to drop it and pretend things are okay. He stands up from his seat, shaking off Kuzuha. Swallowing hard, he makes himself speak. "Fine. It’s getting late - please rest well, okay?" 

Kuzuha looks like he got struck. The expression on his face, the one that makes him feel helpless, hurts him again. His lips move to form something, but Kanae turns away before the pressure of his mind makes him ask more; he refuses to let his own feelings get in the way.

The air is heavy with unspoken words - he’s not sure how much are whose. He makes his way towards the door.

* * *

_It’s always here._

_He's not sure when it starts, where he finds himself in such a place. It's familiar - this hollowing pain of grief, in such a beautiful and cold church. The bells ring in the distance, and he knows he is not where he should be._

_It's all too inviting, and the glance of a friendly smile brings him back. Gaps in his surroundings, unfocused details; he openly stares at the man in front of him, and his worries blur away. There are white lilies in season behind this building, he knows - he blinks, and there's a sickly young man trapped in bed._

_"I won't be here for long," he says, as if he were talking about the weather. "It doesn't hurt anymore. I'm rather glad."_

_Stay with me,_ he thinks, but instead he says, I can find a cure for your illness. I'll make an offer, maybe with O-  
 _  
“It's okay," he shushes, bringing a boney finger to his lips. He flashes a small smile. "Please, I don't want you to do something you don't want. I really enjoyed being with you these past few years."_

 _He can’t fathom why he’s so calm. He hates that he knows he'd do anything he wants._ I’m sick of watching this. I'll find you, _he says then,_ I'll find you and fix this, _over and over in a desperate state. He's not sure if he's convincing himself instead. The terror in his voice is hard to hide._

_The air smells like fresh blood, reminding him of a life before. The noise of laughter and rigid speeches echoes all over his head, bringing him back to when he wasn't Kuzuha. The sun has set already, he remembers. He remembers a cold body of a priest in his arms. He remembers a parched throat, being unbearably thirsty._

_“You always find me,” the man simply says. If it was any other moment, he would admire that confidence, but right now he can’t help but hate that look, that screamed of kindness, of mercy towards someone like him._

_He knows how it goes: A hand reaches for him, caressing his cheek lightly in a final act of life; he watches as it drops, as he has for the previous lives. In the background, he hears the modern machine of his heartbeat flatline. To his horror, the person that laid in his arms melts away, the room along with it._

_He stands up in shock - the lack of sound in this place is apparent now. His stomach churns with vertigo; his head feels like it's tearing itself apart like violent waves crashing against a cliff. Something’s not right. He whispers his name, but it comes out breathless. The weather is cold on his pale skin- the weight of everything is tiringly too much._

_"Kuzuha?" a voice brushes next to his left ear. It's a terrible feeling._

_He feels like he can’t breathe; the air is full of his guilt, regret, his mistakes, stolen and trapped in place. Every blink he takes, he sees another body he’s had to say goodbye to._

_It hurts that there’s nothing he feels when looking at it. (When did that happen?)_

_I’ll do this for all of eternity if fate permits it, he thinks. (Does he? It’s hard to.) He bears the fault of this. He turns around, feeling the presence of someone - the Kanae in front of him, the one he hurt today, smiles eagerly as if he hears him. It pulls at him, the same way he knows the sight of him pulls Kanae closer._

_The angelic boy in front of him opens his mouth, his grin predatory._

_“Will you watch as I waste away too, Kuzuha?”_

“..zuha!”

_“Kuzuha.”_

“Kuzuha, wake up!”

He gasps loudly as his eyes fly open and his body launches forward - for a brief second, his head feels uncomfortably heavy with the weight of his long hair. He shakes, reaching for it, to make sure it’s gone, overwhelmed by the eerily familiar feeling that comes being trapped in the lucid state of a dream he feels the details escaping him. There’s a tight hand on his arm, stopping him from- grounding him as he takes gulping breaths to silence the thundering pulse going through his body, through his mind. 

He doesn't want to let him see this.

“Kuzuha,” Kanae repeats, and what a relief it is to hear how distinctly different it is. He feels him pull his fingers away from the iron grip he had once before, rubbing his knuckles in a circular pattern with his thumb. “Kuzuha, I’m here. Breathe with me.”

The cold air stings, compared to the hot fever he vaguely felt before. His head feels heavy; as he starts to slow his breathing, he finds himself at the mercy of Kanae’s gaze. 

“You were having a nightmare,” he says softly, his eyes softening with concern. It's different too, the way his eyes crease when he makes an expression. To his surprise, he leans forward and wipes something wet off his cheek with his thumb.

 _Oh_ , he thinks to how blurry the room is. _I was crying._ “Sorry...” His voice is hoarse, and he moves to scrub his eyes. He doesn't know if he screamed, or if he woke him up, and that makes him guilty to bring this onto Kanae. He glances around the room - the light is on in the kitchen, but outside is still very dark.

As if he could read his mind, Kanae shook his head. "I was still up, don't worry," he says. Kuzuha flinches as a shadow shoots towards his face - he’s about to scream until he feels the cold press of a hand on his forehead. "Still hot… you had a fever dream,” Kanae says, unnoticing. “You've been asleep for 2 hours." 

It didn't really feel like 2 hours. His reassurance doesn't lessen the pool of dread in his chest, even though it should. He doesn’t even remember when he fell asleep.

"You were crying my name while you were asleep," he told him. "You weren't waking up- I didn't… know what to do. Are you ok?"

Flashes of a bloodied body appear in his head, from his dream. It makes his chest hurt.

"You're here, right?" slips out of his mouth before he realizes it, almost too quiet to be heard. It's desperate and sad and he regrets saying it immediately. He can see Kanae's eyes widen and his fingers still for a moment, and it makes him feel more pathetic than before.

"I'm here," he repeats, firmer than before. He squeezes his hand. "You're here too, you know that?"

He hesitates to answer to be honest, because he’s scared of the answer, and that’s all it takes for Kanae to lean forward, eyes wide with clarity that could never have been found in his dreams. If he had a heart, it would jump. “I’m not going anywhere, okay?”

That feeling of selfishness hits him at full force, but there’s something else with it, something far more hopeful in those words that he could ever imagine, and he grips the fingers interlocked in his own tightly as if he were afraid to let go. “Okay,” he tries, inhaling. “Okay.”

It feels easier to breathe now that the tense pressure is gone. After a few moments, it's just the quiet noise of breathing that he hears. If he concentrates, he can focus on the heartbeat in the room, healthy and strong.

"You okay now?" he asks, cutting the silence. It's the same question as before, but he knows what he means.

He nods, and he can see Kanae’s mouth perk up in satisfaction.

“Is there- anything I can do?” Kanae asks amidst a yawn - he can’t help but feel disappointed when he lets go of his hands, but he stiffens when he feels a weight on his legs. Kanae stretches his arms to lean on the blanket, trying to become comfortable. It reminds him of a cat laying on top of him and refusing to move.

“You being here is more than enough,” he says. “You should go back to your bed...”

“Did you really think I would leave, when it’s just as comfortable here?” he retorts, but it loses its seriousness when he says it in such a sleepy drawl. Kuzuha stares dubiously - his eyes wander from the rigid chair to the poor posture Kanae must be in. 

_It’s cold_ , he thinks, but that might just be the fever talking. He lifts the blanket out under Kanae’s arms and, before his brain catches up, lazily mumbles, “Get in.”

Kanae almost does something that could be called a stumble, before staring at him in disbelief for a few moments. Kuzuha tries his best to not break under that stare.

"I told you whatever I have isn't contagious," he supplies. 

Kanae seems to snap out of his surprise, because he nods and climbs in. His body is a warm and pleasant welcome and he involuntarily leans closer, burying his face in the sheets. He can feel Kanae’s hesitation - he pulls him closer, wrapping an arm around his waist to pull him closer. It’s not as simple as that, he knows, but he can hear a breath of relief from him at his invitation. 

There’s not much room to move around in the bed. The quiet silence is much louder; it’s comfortable and lulling, hearing the slow and steady breaths of his friend. It goes on for so long he thinks he’s fallen asleep, and something cowardly inside of him decides to speak now.

“I have these nightmares sometimes,” he whispers, almost inaudible to his own ears. It feels like it echoes regardless, in the room too small for two. “They’re always about you.”

There’s no response from him. He waits, feeling his eyes grow tired until he hears his partner shift, the blanket rustling until he finds him facing clear blue eyes. “Yeah?” he asks, waiting for him to continue. There’s no judgement in it, just understanding. 

So he continues. "Sometimes having such a long memory hurts. It gets bad.” He trails off, unsure how to put it. “It turns into nightmares. I dreamt that- that you were sick. You were sick for a really long time, and it felt like I could only sit there and watch. Nothing I knew could be offered to help.” He swallows, closing his eyes to remember without any of the estranged nightmare memories. “I saw you leave me. I felt myself not care, and that was one of the worst parts. I just- it feels pathetic. They’re just dreams. I didn’t want you to see that.”

“... of course I do. I want to help,” Kanae whispers in return. “But I feared I was being selfish. You know how much I respect your privacy. I didn’t want you to think you needed to share.”

“I _did_ want to,” he admits. “I’m really grateful you do that, but I did want to tell you one day. I was just… scared. I didn’t know when. It didn’t really seem important compared to everything else.”

“You are,” he huffs, nudging at him. The contact feels real. “You’re always important to me.” 

He knows that. He’s always known. “You too. Sorry you had to take care of me,” he mumbles, leaning into his chest.

“Stop that,” he chides airily. “...So? Do you feel better talking about it?”

“Yeah,” he says, and he’s surprised at how easy it was to say it. He can feel Kanae’s small chuckles; he thinks he wouldn’t be anywhere else. “Thank you. Tell me about you too?”

“Hm?”

“Talking. I want to know what you want to ask.”

He feels eyes on him. He kicks at his ankle to hurry it up - Kanae rolls his eyes and talks. 

Kuzuha answers.

He tells him when he wants to avoid a topic, or when he says he wants to in the future. He tells him he’s glad to be here. He says he wants to talk about his first friend later. He tells him misses his mom. He tells him of the story where he met a human in rags, too wary of him to let him near. He thinks out loud that maybe Kanae would've liked this certain place a thousand miles away. He tells him the stupid rules in vampire society, aged poorly for over hundreds of years old. He tells him he really likes the smell of vanilla because it was one of the first human smells he was introduced to.

He talks and talks until his voice trails off, until his voice turns into unintelligible mumbles and he feels his eyes closing. 

He thinks it might just be his fuzzy consciousness or the heavy headache that pulls at his eyes, but he hears faintly, “Thank you too.”

* * *

_"Look! The lilies are blooming already! C'mon, let's go, let's go!"_

_"Kanae, you're going to hurt yourself again."_

_"Agh, but I haven't gone out of my bed in days! I'm going there with or without you, you know, and I'd be really sad if you didn't!"_

_"Okay, okay, fine, just- just let me open the window and hold on to me then. We're skipping the elevator."_

**Author's Note:**

> @nebur_789: eh???  
> 02:22  
> |  
> @nebur_789: @nebur_789 what happened to the stream???  
> 02:23 
> 
> @tsubasa_: ?! ! Kanae sounded really panicked and I heard a loud noise at the end????  
> 02:22 
> 
> @m3tuti14: i'm really concerned...  
> 02:25 
> 
> @Kanae_2434: Thank you for watching the stream. I'm sorry for scaring everyone but please don’t worry. Again, I'm sorry for ending the stream so suddenly.  
> 02:31
> 
> @Kanae_2434: Good morning~ I'm going to be more vigilant from now on!!  
> 09:26  
> |  
> @Vamp_Kuzu: @Kanae_2434 thank you for your hard work  
> 13:53  
> |  
> @Kanae_2434: @Vamp_Kuzu Stop reading Twitter and get up already…  
> 13:56  
> |  
> @Vamp_Kuzu: @Kanae_2434 i suddenly felt like vomiting on your floor just now  
> 13:56
> 
> @Vamp_Kuzu: after all homemade soup is delicious  
> 14:01 
> 
> @Vamp_Kuzu posted a Fleet.  
> 14:01 
> 
> _
> 
> They hung out for a few more days to make up for it ( ᐛ )و
> 
> I wrote this with the intention that the two still stream/live in modern Japan, but with some basic character lore we’ve been presented. So, the character settings we’ve been presented in MVs don’t apply here too strictly (?) - for example, roto doesn’t play an active role in this, but Kuzuha is still an immortal being who always becomes friends with Kanae. Kuzuha has been with Kanae for multiple lives, but this Kanae only knows Kuzuha for one life - especially with a Kuzuha that has been experienced. I think Kanae would really respect his personal space and appreciate what Kuzuha shares, but he can't help but feel bitter that he doesn't really know some things that feel really obvious, and that bites at him. 
> 
> Maybe Kuzuha just dreamed of a Kanae being sick. It all blurs together, eventually.
> 
> In the first place, I wrote a lot of self indulgent things that probably shouldn't have overlapped haha. I hope that this loose setting I’ve written still gave a good impact ;;
> 
> I've always loved the meaning of lilies even before Geminids, and considered a lot of varieties for the title. Stargazer was the title before this - they are a type of lily that I liked, and the meanings and word were something I thought CNR were suited to. (In the end, I figured stargazer lilies shared too many similarities with normal lilies.)
> 
> I'm really thankful for eng fans on twitter who talk about them - this one was made thanks to you :bow:


End file.
